Socially Unacceptable Post 41: Cracks

Somebody shine a light
I’m frozen by the fear in me
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me

–Shatter Me by Lindsey Stirling

As I am writing this, I am staring at a screen with cracks all over it. But not really. My schizophrenia has decided that today every screen I look at has cracks that are spreading across it.

The shows I watched today looked like kaleidoscopes, but I had watched them before so I knew what was going on. My writing experience is interesting because the text is barely legible.

This used to happen when I was a Customer Service Representative and worked with two monitors. I would be trying to reconnect services after a bill was paid and be staring through a web of cracks.

Hallucinations are not always that bad. Sometimes they are just annoying. But it’s the culmination of symptoms weighing down on me that drives me to exhaustion. Although I guess the fact that my period started this week isn’t helping the situation.

Good thing I’m a stubborn bitch, I suppose.

Post 41 in Socially Unacceptable: The Daily Life of a Queer Schizophrenic Wreck (2022)

This is an autobiographical series about my life, something I have wanted to do for a long time. I intend to add new content daily.

For the whole series, follow this link.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s